In any other circumstance, I might have been able to catch myself with my feet but not today. After torn tights, a boo boo on the knee and a missing ear bud, I kept going.
2 days ago I decided to purchase a training plan from UpLiftTraining. One of the women I have run with in the past is the owner. I kid you not she looks like an off duty super hero. I have overheard her discussing ultra marathons with the other women and that she had a toddler. While I also have a toddler, I do not look like an off duty superhero. More like working mom that gets asked occasionally if I am expecting. All I do is run. Its on my to do list to do "other stuff" in terms of fitness. So, I am doing "other stuff".
I am starting to see my grief patterns. Whenever something happens to upset the balance in my world (usually a broken heart), I throw myself into something new that usually hurts like school or more fitness.
It has been 2 days of biceps/triceps and glutes/legs. While I still do not look like super hero, it sure does hurt. I chose this plan because it is geared for women to do in the home. It also doesn't require a lot of fancy gear, just willingness and weights. Right now it feels like I am utilizing muscles that have never seen the light of day. It is both awesome and painful. While I do not strive for super hero status, I would like to stop appearing as if I am expecting.
My 3 mile (recovery) run wasn't a total bust (Note: I usually run to workout, not recover from a workout). I found some stamps on the sidewalk. I had some quiet time to think about Bob (as I do frequently). I listened to music.
My college roommate told me that I must grieve but not despair. She said there is so much evidence of the "other side" where our loved ones were waiting. In thinking about this, I remembered that it was Bob that showed me a site called Despair.com.
|It's still freaking hilarious.|
I had a sense he was sort of telling me to lighten up. I hear you Bob. Thanks.
|This is me still trolling his FB page, now a memorial. I like seeing his Art.|